Writing tip on what and how to write a sympathy card
The guide provides you with all the necessary details and suggestions for writing a sympathy card. Please continue to see our detailed guides to understand when and how to send condolence messages to friends, family or co-workers. We also look at how writing words can help show your deepest sympathies.
You can show compassion and help the grieving person feel loved in several ways but nothing is more important during or after the pain. When someone close to you dies, it can be difficult to know what to say in a sympathy card message. You may feel like you are intruding on their grief or that your own words won't be enough. You don't want to write the wrong thing and cause any additional pain, suffering or hurt their feelings.
But, when done correctly, writing a sympathy card message is one of the most thoughtful things you can do for someone who is grieving. In this guide, we will walk you through the ins and outs of writing a meaningful and heartfelt message for someone who has lost a loved one.
So why do people send sympathy cards?
You might wonder if we should even send a message of condolence, but that’s ok. It's a valid thought. Sure, you can send a text to someone who is dying but this can be erased with a simple tap of the delete key (even accidentally). As a result, it provides no indication of your thoughts for the person.
Sympathy cards can be displayed throughout a home for weeks following a loss - just a reminder of the sympathy and support you're offering.
In addition, a sympathy card is read with time and provides enduring support during the darkest hours for the recipients.
What to write on a funeral card
Let's look at the first part which is what to write in a funeral card. This will depend on how well you knew them and your relationship. Were they a close friend, are you offering condolences to the whole family or do you want just the right words for the loss of a furry friend?
Offer to Help
If you are available for assistance with arrangements, meal planning or any other things, please add it to your message. Keep it in check.
Example writing tips: In general, it's best to give a clear offer of help. No mission should be too big.
Reassure them that you're just a phone call away and when they feel comfortable talking, you're there for them.
Show Appreciation
It can be comforting when one is feeling like someone has also admired and praised his/her loved one. When you know or appreciated the person who has transitioned, please notify them. How would we describe our deceased?
Consider the following things: lovingly gifted, respected, loved, funny, wonderful and loved.
Send Condolences
There are many great reasons why you should keep your own sympathy messages simple. Maybe the cards are saying the exact same thing you wanted. Or perhaps you have never known anyone who has passed away.
Example Writing tip: If you knew someone that has passed away and not the deceased family members to whom you sent your cards, you might have a good way of mentioning your connections to the deceased relative.
What if you cannot attend the funeral or memorial service
If you cannot make it then do not despair. There are many reasons for not attending and this is another reason why a personalised sympathy message is a perfect choice. In this situation, it is possible to add more details to your written message.
For example, write a loving and personal sympathy message in a card and you might choose to include a gesture of appreciation or gift.
What is a good sympathy message?
Sincerity, empathy, love? A good thought to include could be how you met the deceased or even your best memory of them. Below are some examples of how to choose the right words based on the person you're remembering or your relationship with them.
Sympathy Messages for loss of Mother or Father
It's never easy to know what to say when someone's parents have died. The loss of a parent is one of the most difficult things a person can experience, and there are no words that can truly make the pain go away. This is a family member that can never be replaced!
However, sometimes just being there and offering a listening ear can be helpful. You might not say anything at all, and that's ok. Just being present and showing your support can mean a lot to someone who is grieving.
Here are a few things you could say:
- I'm so sorry for your loss. Your mum was a special person
- Your parents were amazing people.
- I know you will miss them so much but hope they have now found peace
- I'll be here for you in this challenging time, no matter what.
- Do you want to talk about your parents? I'm always happy to listen.
- Our deepest sympathy for the loss. We'll be keeping you in our thoughts and prayers.
- Sending you lots of love during this tough time.
Sympathy Messages for Loss of a Sibling (Brother or Sister)
Losing a brother or sister is an unimaginable tragedy. No one should have to go through that type of pain. If you know someone whose sibling has just died, there are a few things you can say to help them through this sad time.
First, offer heartfelt condolences and let them know that you are there for them. It's important to offer your assistance and let them know that they are not alone. You can also share your own experiences with losing a loved one. This can help them feel understood and give them some perspective.
Finally, encourage them to talk about their brother or sister and keep their memory alive. This can be a very healing process for grieving individuals. By being supportive and understanding, you can help someone who is grieving the loss of a brother or sister start to heal.
Here are some good examples to help:
- I'm so sorry for your loss. Your brother was an amazing person and he will be deeply missed.
- I know it's hard to lose a sibling, and I can't even imagine how you're feeling right now.
- If there's anything I can do to help, please don't hesitate to let me know.
- I'll be keeping you and your entire family in my thoughts during this difficult time.
Loss of a wife sympathy messages (or husband)
Losing a husband or wife is a difficult thing for their spouse to go through. If you know someone who has just lost their partner, it is important to be there for them during this sad time.
Express your condolences and let them know that you are there for them. Offer to help in any way you can, whether it is running errands or just being a shoulder to cry on. Most importantly, try to avoid saying anything that could come across as insensitive or hurtful. This is not a time for platitudes or advice; simply being there for someone who is grieving can make a world of difference.
Here are a few things you can say to someone in a sympathy note for the loss of a husband or wife:
- We were deeply saddened to hear your sad news. He was a wonderful man.
- I'm so sorry to hear about your terrible loss. She brought us so much joy and had a remarkable life.
- Your husband/wife was an amazing person and a good friend.
- I can't imagine how difficult this must be. Our thoughts and prayers are for you.
Loss of children
Losing a child is one of the most difficult experiences a parent can go through. It's natural to feel overwhelmed by grief and struggle to find the words to comfort someone who is grieving.
Here are a few things you can say to someone who has lost a son or daughter:
- I'm so sorry for your loss
- Your child was lucky to have you as a parent
- I can't imagine how you're feeling right now
- Is there anything I can do to help?
- You're not alone in this
- She had so many smiles and and will live on in our hearts forever
Try to avoid saying things that could make them feel worse, such as "they're in a better place," or "it was meant to be."
Instead, try to simply express your condolences and offer to help in any way you can. Let them know that you are there for them and that they are not alone in this difficult time.
Let them grieve in their own time and in their own way.
What to write in a condolence card for a miscarriage, stillborn or loss of a baby?
Losing a baby is one of the most devastating and unthinkable things that can happen to a parent. There are no words that can truly capture the grief and heartache that comes with such a loss.
However, it is important to try to express your condolences and support to the parents during this difficult time.
You might say something like:
- I'm so sorry for your loss
- I can't imagine how you must be feeling
- If there's anything I can do to help, please don't hesitate to let me know
- Good night to a precious little girl
- Born with angel wings
- Heaven has gained an angel far too early
By offering your condolences and support, you can provide some comfort during this very difficult time. A simple gesture like this can mean the world to someone who is grieving the loss of their baby.
Loss of a pet
Losing a beloved pet is always a difficult experience. The pet becomes a part of the family, and their loss can leave us feeling overwhelmed with grief. If you know someone who has just lost their pet, it's important to be there for them in this time of need.
Here are a few pet sympathy card messages to offer your support:
- I know how much you loved your dog and his waggy tail will be missed
- I wish I had been there for you when it happened
- God has gained a faithful and loyal companion
- I can see him now cocking his leg against the pearly gates
- She's gone on to the scratching post in the sky
- Your pet was lucky to have you as his owner
Pets bring so much joy into our lives, and it's heartbreaking when they're gone. By offering your support and understanding, you can help your friend or family member through this tough time.
Condolences to a friend who lost someone special
It can be difficult to know what to say to a friend who has lost someone special. You might feel like you need to say something to make them feel better, but sometimes the best thing you can do is simply be there for them.
Just being present and listening to what they have to say can mean a lot. You could also offer to help with any practical tasks that need to be done, such as handling funeral arrangements or shopping.
Sometimes simply doing something practical can be a valuable way of showing your support. Whatever you do, just try to be respectful and understanding – your friend will appreciate it more than you know.
Loss Of A Coworker Sympathy Card Messages
If you've just lost a colleague or friend, it can be hard to know what to say. First and foremost, it's important to express your condolences and let the person know that you are sorry for their loss. You might also want to share a memory of the colleague or mention something you admired about them.
Let them talk about their colleague and how they're feeling. Don't try to offer too much advice or tell them how they should be feeling. Sometimes the best thing you can do is just be a shoulder to cry on.
When someone has died by suicide
It can be extremely difficult when someone has just lost a loved one to suicide. They might feel shocked, confused, and overwhelmed. However, it is important to remember that the grieving process is different for everyone.
- We're all shocked and saddened by the news. Our thoughts are with you
- I am so sorry to hear of your loss and offer support for your pain.
- There is great sadness in my heart for your loss. You have my most heartfelt condolences
- Find family comfort in this heart-wrenching time
- I feel lucky to have known your son. His loss will be felt in so many lives by everyone in the family and all his friends
A sudden or unexpected death
Sudden death is always a shock, no matter how prepared you think you are. It is sudden and unexpected, and it leaves those who are left behind feeling stunned and grieving.
Whether it's a car accident, a heart attack, or something else, it's always unexpected and can leave us feeling lost and confused. If you know someone who has experienced the sudden death of a loved one, it is important to be supportive and understanding.
So what to write in a sympathy card for an unexpected passing?
- Your grandfather's passing is a devastating loss and he will be terribly missed
- Our family will not be the same without such a fun young person. Our most sincere condolences to you
- They were an incredible person and this feels wrong. All the wonderful memories will live on forever!
- A dear friend and great soul has been taken too soon. This is such a difficult loss and they will be greatly missed
A death in the family suddenly is always a tragedy, but with the love and support of family and friends, the grieving process can be easier to bear.
Short condolence messages
If you just need some short sympathy messages then these are some of the best ideas for you:
- Our sincere condolences
- Sending our heartfelt sympathy
- They will be sorely missed
- They had an amazing life
- We have many beautiful memories
- My heart aches for you
- She touched so many lives
- Our deepest condolences
Religious Sympathy Messages
Depending on your religion or the recipient of the greeting cards, you may be struggling on what to write in a sympathy card. Do you want to include your warmest condolences and a religious message. This could be kind words about a god or even a bible verse. Here are a few examples:
- Sending healing prayers from afar
- Our lord and saviour will help them find peace
- God loves and comforts those in sorrow
- God bless your entire family in this sad time
- May you find peace during this time of sorrow
- Our father's guiding hand will help show them the way in such an important place
Uplifting Sympathy Card messages
No one can prepare you for a loss; it comes like a swift wind. Grief is a journey that takes time and patience. There are no rules to follow and the process looks different for everyone.
Nevertheless, know that you are not alone on this difficult road. Others have walked this path before you and many more will walk it with you. Take comfort in knowing that your loved one is now at peace and free from pain. Cherish the happy memories you shared together and know that they will live on in your heart forever.
Sometimes deepest sympathy cards require positive encouragement messages to provide support and comfort. You might want to consider some of these examples of what to write in a sympathy card that is uplifting.
- We have so many fond memories of your Grandmother's remarkable life.
- Sending love as you celebrate your Grandmother’s who was a wonderful woman.
- I’m so sorry to hear of your dad. He will be remember as a good and generous man
- Your wonderful mother was greatly appreciated and a true friend
- Ask me at the funeral service and I will tell you a funny story about such a great person
When should you send sympathy card messages?
When it comes to expressing sympathy and your condolences, timing is everything. A card sent too soon may be seen as insensitive, while a card sent too late may be seen as an afterthought. So how can you strike the right balance?
Generally speaking, it's best to send a sympathy card within a week or two of the death. This shows that you are still grieving and haven't forgotten about your loved one. Of course, there are always exceptions to this rule.
If you live far away or have been busy with other commitments, it's perfectly understandable to send a card a little later. The most important thing is to express your condolences in a way that feels genuine and heartfelt.
How do I sign a sympathy card?
Now you have some lovely ideas of what to write in a sympathy card, you may ask how you sign the sympathy cards? This is dependent on the messages you have written. It is important to keep your sign-off, short and simple, and to avoid saying anything that might make the grieving person feel worse.
Here are a few suggestions for how to sign off a sympathy card:
- With deepest sympathy,
- Thinking of you in this difficult time,
- In loving memory,
- With caring thoughts,
- You are in our thoughts and prayers.
- May the love of those around you help you through this tough time.
Then just pop your name on the bottom and you're good to go.
Following up
Please remember, sending a card is only the beginning. It is also important to follow up with the bereaved to see how they are doing. This can be done in a variety of ways, such as calling, sending a text, or even stopping by for a visit.
Following up shows that you care and that you are still thinking about the person who has lost a loved one. It can be a difficult time for everyone involved, but following up shows that you are there for them and that you are willing to support them through this difficult time.
Additional resources and support during a time of loss
We've hand-picked a few useful resources for you to help through hard times.
- NHS - Grief after bereavement or loss
- GOV - Bereavement help and support
- At a Loss - the UK's bereavement signposting website
- UKSOBS - Survivors of bereavement by suicide
- Samaritans - Whatever you're going through, a Samaritan will face it with you. There for you 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.
- Child Bereavement UK - They help children, young people, parents, and families to rebuild their lives when a child grieves or when a child dies.
- Blue Cross - Pet bereavement and pet loss. Speak to one of their fully-trained team if you're experiencing pet loss of any kind
- BEAD - Bereaved through Alcohol and Drugs. A source of information, support and hope for anyone whose loved one has died as a result of drug or alcohol use.
Remember that you're not alone and there is always help out there for you and someone to talk too.
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